I have let my blogging go by the wayside lately. My depression has really gotten the best of me. The sad thing is that I know the why behind the depression BUT can’t do anything about it. I keep waiting to get better, like my Fibromyalgia and other medical issues are just going to fix themselves. I have the hardest time accepting that I am going to be struggling with these problems for the rest of my life.
Have you ever felt tired? Bone weary, ‘I want to give up,’ tired? The people that I have left in my life, try to understand what it’s like for me everyday but… unless you have been there then it’s difficult to understand. This is how I feel everyday and I keep waiting to get better. How stupid am I?
I was hospitalized recently for Suicidal Ideation. Not the first time but it was a much better experience in that my Psychiatrist was able to get my meds right. Now if I would only take them like I am supposed to. I just don’t take them at all. I guess you could say that I am the definition of insanity. History is going to keep repeating itself if I don’t start making the positive changes that I need to make in order to move forward.